I don't feel I have much to say today, as I'm pretty exhausted. I still have to go and write today's song, so I'll go get to work and let yesterday's music do the talking.
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This piece marks the end of week seven. At some point I stopped actively counting the days as they click past, so realising I've been at this for seven weeks is a bit of a shock. By the end of next week I'll have finished my third month, and one whole season of songs. These daily videos are not just a record of my creative output, but also a record of a year in my life going by, which is quite nice. We are coming to the end of Melbourne summer, so as the days become shorter and cooler I am sure my songs will adapt to the new season just as much as my wardrobe will. Despite fluctuations in energy and enthusiasm for the project my body and mind show no signs of quitting, so I really hope I can make through all four seasons of songs.
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This project is making me really aware of the day-to-day fluctuations in emotional and physical energy I experience, and the very real effect that energy level has on my work. I wrote yesterday morning about feeling burnt out, which I absolutely was the day before when I was trying to work on piece #47. Last night, however, I felt entirely the opposite. I was refreshed, ready and excited, and looking forward to an evening by myself in my studio. I had tidied up a bit, which definitely helped entice me into my newly neat space, and I was anticipating the enjoyment of the night's work the same way you'd anticipate the enjoyment of a party. I even indulged the Saturday night vibe with some fairy lights.
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I'm coming to the end of the third week into my full teaching schedule, and I'm starting to feel a little burnt out. When I don't have a lot of time for working on the day's piece I fall into tried and tested habits and processes, and while I'm in the composition process my inner voices are telling me that the music is becoming routine and uninteresting as a result. Many of the processes help me turn off those inner voices, but perhaps as I get better at using the processes the voices get better at finding their way through my defences. I think the answer is to keep introducing new processes and composition exercises, to keep my brain distracted from self criticism.
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One of the songwriting tools I use regularly is an etymological dictionary. Looking at the origin of words is a really fascinating way of finding links between seemingly unrelated objects and ideas. My original starting point for this piece was umbrella, and the origin of that word comes from umbra, which is related to shadows and also to phantoms and ghosts. It is an interesting coincidence that the words shade and umbrella are linked, as shade also appeared in the previous day's piece. I took the ghostly route, and worked off the idea of trying to imagine a loved one back into existence.
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I delved into my experimental self for this piece, but unfortunately my audio recorder didn't pick up much of the water sounds. I was pretty exhausted yesterday, and so I allocated myself a half hour window in which to get the piece done. I used ink from the previous day as a starting theme, and a mind map led me to cobalt blue. Some internet wandering brought up Renoir's painting The Umbrellas, which was painted using two different shades of blue: the first stages of the painting done using cobalt, and later stages with ultramarine. This idea of an umbrella in two shades of blue inspired the text, and my kitchen provided the props.
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I concluded yesterday's blog post by saying that I would let interest and enjoyment be my guide, and I think that's something that deserves a little exploration. It's not quite as simple as just doing what you are enjoying, especially if you want to develop your skills at something. What is good for you may not necessarily be enjoyable, and it is easy to become bored or to feel like your practice is stagnating if you don't work outside of your comfort zone every now and then.
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For this piece I took a fragment of yesterday's melody, wrote the notes on scraps of paper and pulled them out of a hat to create a new melody. The first time I pulled them out, however, they were in perfect ascending scale order, so I discarded that melodic idea. If I were really giving myself over to randomness I should have gone with that first attempt, but I found the orderliness uninspiring so I had another go. Really, I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to make something interesting out of half a scale, and I didn't even give myself the chance to try. Next time I'll stick to my guns, and work with whatever material my methods throw up.
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One of the reasons I started this project was to give myself permission to create whatever kind of music that day inspired. After releasing my debut album Twelve Moons last year I spent a lot of time struggling to categorise the music I liked to make, and trying to fit it into predefined genre boxes (folk? jazz? experimental?) that it was never quite the right shape for.
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Friday's deadline failure has made me realise that 2am bed times for the rest of the year are just not sustainable, especially when I am teaching at 8:30 or 9am the following day. I have generally been good at actually writing and recording the day's song before midnight (or at worst before 1am), but I don't feel my task is complete until I edit the video, upload it, write the day's blog post and then share it across my social media platforms.
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I could fib, and tell you that I recorded this yesterday and just didn't have time to upload it, but that's not really in the spirit of this project. So no, I didn't record this yesterday. I didn't even finish writing it yesterday. I had the guitar part and half the lyrics done, and then I fell asleep, exhausted, on the couch with a pencil in my hand while trying to work on the second half of the words. I gave in, and went to bed, I woke this morning refreshed but very annoyed that I hadn't just recorded what I had, instead of labouring over it when my mind had clearly switched off for the day.
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I composed and recorded this one after having a wonderful chat with an old friend of mine for next week's episode of Mind Over Myth (which is now available for you to subscribe to on iTunes). He stayed for dinner, so once again I was chipping away at my daily song late at night. Since transitioning to a career as a musician and music teacher I have struggled with the change in schedule. Unlike my old 9 - 5 jobs, I do the bulk of my work in the late afternoons and evenings. The habit of many years' relaxing in the evenings is a hard one to break, and I feel strange and guilty if I sit down in the morning or early afternoon to watch a film, knit or sew, or just do something mind numbing for a few hours. All the late-night songwriting is taking its toll, however, and I realise I really do need some downtime. I spent a few hours before lunch today watching Vice documentaries, and there was one about Romanian witches that stuck in my mind. In particular, it was the idea of the witches tearing open the sky to read the future that really struck me.
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This piece is improvised, following on from yesterday's themes of transport and rain. Yesterday it was a car, today a train. I wrote the text first, then freely improvised with it and recorded only one take. While I like spending time crafting and perfecting a piece of music, I also love improvising freely, and there is something particularly interesting about the very first performance of an idea. My composition process involves recording improvisations like this and then listening back to them for ideas to expand upon, but those improvisations rarely make it past a voice memo on my phone. This project gives them a reason to exist as compositions in their own right, and I am excited to develop this part of my practice as the year progresses.
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I considered leaving this to tomorrow morning to record, simply because I would have had more fun if I could crank my amp a bit. Once I start doing that, however, there's nothing stopping me from putting the writing off until the morning too, so I stuck to plan and recorded as quietly as I could.
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I have two younger sisters, and we are close in age and in friendship. My middle sister moved to New York last year, and although the internet makes it easy for us to send little messages back and forth throughout our respective days, it's not the same as having her here in Melbourne. I worked with the theme of distance from yesterday's piece, and wrote this for her. Recording it made me a little emotional, because I miss her, and reminds me of the power music has to move and change us, and make us think. Songwriting, for me it seems, is a balancing act between keeping unhelpful emotions out of the process, while allowing helpful emotions to flow freely through the composition and the performance.
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Apparently I'm 9.5% of the way through this project, which doesn't seem very far at all. I already feel that my process is becoming stale, so I introduced some rigorous serial composition into today's piece to shift me away from habit. I took the words ruby and secret from yesterday's title and used them as the basis for the composition.
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It's summer in Melbourne, and even though it wasn't particularly hot today my flat just won't cool down. I don't like to play or practice with the windows open for the sake of our neighbours, so spending time locked in a small room with no airflow has been particularly uncomfortable the last couple of days. I got about half an hour of guitar scales in today before I'd had enough, so I kept today's piece very simple.
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I have been having some really nice conversations with my friend Emilee Seymour lately, as she is visiting Melbourne from Paris for a few weeks. Today we went to the Australian Tapestry Workshop, which was a big leap back into my past. I posted about it on Instagram, and after a comment exchange with Lucy Roleff (a fellow Melbourne-based musician) I thought I would explore the issue of identity a little in today's blog.
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Today marks the first day of month two of this year-long project. I should probably write a bit of a reflection on month one, but I might do that as a separate post tomorrow when I have a some free time. Today I'll keep my writing about my composition, and I might get a little nerdy in today's post. If you're one of my non-musician friends you might want to skip through to the bit about the lyrics.
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Today marks the end of my first month of songs and I can't quite believe I've produced 31 new pieces of music in as many days. I can barely remember what I did last week, let alone the first week of this project. I think my next task has to be to book a gig, so that I have an excuse to workshop some of these songs to completion.
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