SCP #137: Migraine+Hives (I)

So far in this project I haven't really been sick, but last week I crossed that hurdle. Since just before Easter I have been experiencing a mysterious case of hives every time I exercise. I have been pretty sedentary since they started, which is an easy habit to fall into when you're locked in a practice / teaching room all day with your instruments. In a burst of inspiration to get active I went out for a jog, and came home an allergic mess. As well as hives covering my entire body, my lips and tongue had swelled up, so I went to the emergency room in case of anaphylactic shock.

SCP #74: Needle And Skin

My last post was Thursday, which seems like an eternity ago as the last few days have been really difficult. This project was never meant to be easy, although up to now it has never felt impossible, and I've generally kept to my deadlines and retained my confidence in my ability to churn out new music when required. Over the weekend, however, I fell apart and spent a large part of it paralysed by anxiety. My rational brain knew that if I could just sit down and do the work I would end up with something, but when I tried I was unable to concentrate and found the anxiety expressing itself in physical symptoms, which is something I haven't really experienced before.

SCP #16: Spin Me Like A Top

I have been binge-listening to a couple of really fantastic music-related podcasts recently. The first is Susan De Weger's Beyond the Stage, which explores the way music training can enhance careers beyond the traditional performance-based options that are becoming increasingly rare. The second is Ben Turner's Double Depresso, which explores mental health in the arts. I happen to be meeting up with Ben tomorrow morning to have a chat for a future episode, but the interview I listened to this morning with musician-turned-psychologist Fran felt particularly relevant to this project. There was a lot of chat about the perils of social media, in particular the addictive nature of the "like" culture. So far I've settled into a fairly robust writing routine, however the public nature of the project is not something I have quite figured out yet. I spoke a little in a previous post about it giving me an audience to feel accountable to and help keep me on track with my daily deadline, but I didn't really address the darker side.

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